Finished With Fox News?

As longtime Fox News viewers, we’ve noticed that the network has taken a turn for the worse in recent years. While everyone can appreciate attractive on-air reporters and anchors, that was never the focus at FNC.

Mr. BW enjoys watching the likes of Gretchen Carlson, Megyn Kelly, Jane Skinner, Julie Banderas & Martha MacCallum (and fondly remembers the ethereal beauty of Linda Vester), but they always had the smarts and experience to not rely on their looks to carry them. They inform and occasionally entertain us, and their looks are incidental to that. They don’t need to dress like skin flashes waiting to happen in order to do their jobs.

We used to assume we were in the prime target audience of Fox News: 2 adults who are patriotic Americans (one naturalized), sick of media bias (CNN & MSNBC are so far left it’s not even funny anymore; the broadcast networks have long tilted left), like to stay informed, high income. But in the last two years or so, it has become obvious that Fox News has decided to pander to the lowest common denominator, figuring that adding eyeballs at the cost of content (and eyeballs that admittedly watch certain “reporters” with the volume turned all the way down) is the way to go. During that time, skilled (and beautiful) women who passed a certain age and/or didn’t flash skin were replaced by inferior women who can’t read a TelePrompTer, ad lib or cover their cleavage. They also decided, for some bizarre reason, to replace longtime entertainment reporter Bill McCuddy and his grown-up brand of wit and style with a couple of insipid blondes (we’re looking at you Courtney Friel and Jill Dobson!) who breathlessly go on and on (and on and on) about “OMG! Paris wore this and then Justin said that! OMGOMGOMG!”

All of this was annoying enough, but then early last year, some exec decided it was a good idea to replace the entire lineup of Fox & Friends Weekend (a relatively mature group who knew how to have fun, but could also be mature and sensitive as stories dictated) with two goofball guys (Clayton Morris and Dave Briggs) and purported eye candy Ainsley Earhardt (in over her bleached head in the center seat) and Courtney Friel (to mangle the headlines). Suddenly, what had been something we looked forward to waking up to every weekend morning – the news with some fun – turned into an immature, innuendo-laden mess. They were disrespectful toward anyone who happened to be famous before they were born and had the misfortune of dying on a weekend. They got downright sleazy, most apparent in Ainsley Earhardt’s wardrobe. When a woman has a buxom and curvy figure, it’s important to not look over the top sexy. Getting clothes in the proper size (not too tight) is a good start. Next, one has to decide whether to emphasize cleavage (low-cut top), legs (miniskirt) or overall curves (snug fit), and not do all three at one time EVERY FREAKING DAY, as she does. The tacky hair extensions need to go, too.

It was about a year ago that someone in the executive offices decided it was time to pull the plug on the cheap Animal House imitation and install Alisyn Camerota in the center seat, where she has done better than anyone could have reasonably expected in reining in the two guys and restoring the show to Watchable Status.

So, when some genius allows both Alisyn and Gretchen to take vacations at the same time, it exposes Fox has having a rather shallow bench for female morning host duties, which is how we wound up with Ainsley (busting out of her dresses) crammed down our throats these past few days, and last weekend.

While we’re relieved (sort of) that Tin Man pointed out in the previous post comments that Aly will return tomorrow, we are hesitant to return to watching Fox News on weekend mornings, as we feel we are no longer in their desired target demographic group. As thinking adults who don’t live in our parents’ basements and chronically masturbate to the news – with the volume turned all the way down – we believe they don’t care about us, our years-long loyalty or our disposable income (as it relates to their advertisers) as they do a group of permanently celibate shut-ins who degrade and demean the very women they claim to worship.

It will definitely be a victory of Evil Over Good if “Gretch Gone: Ainsley On” becomes a more common thing. Then again, we may not be around to see it, as we know when we (and our money) are not wanted.